8/27/2010

Rough Around the Edges

The running joke about me lately (besides the fact that my last name has something in common with Spiderman, and that I'm short) is that I make people cry.
It's funny because, when you think about it, I look entirely too sweet and seem entirely too nice to cause people tears.
And a lot of the time, this holds true. I am a rather nice person and hate hurting people's feelings.
Unfortunately, I also have the temper of a wild animal. I'm fine when left alone, but when prodded and poked I snap.
I also have this unfortunate problem when it comes to thinking about what I say before I say it. Most of the time, I don't do that. I don't think about how I will come across to that person.
Both of the aforementioned things cause drama, hurt feelings, and occasionally tears (from time to time).
Actually, I've been told that I've made ALL of my sister's friends cry at least once, and I hurt people more often than I intend.
It's something that I try working on constantly, and yet never improve upon. I don't think I can change this. I don't think that I'll ever think hard enough about what I'm saying or not saying in order not to offend people. It doesn't mean that I won't continue working on it... I'm just saying not to expect a change.

This post was brought on by the fact that Rachel's boyfriend told me that he's tired of me treating him "like trash" and he deleted my number. I wanted him to delete my number months ago, so that doesn't bother me.
What's irritating is that I've been treating him fairly well. I really have. I joke around with him and have been extra nice lately. We've been getting along, or so I thought. So this is out of nowhere and unwarranted.
In cases like these I will usually admit that I said something wrong and apologize. This time, I can't figure out what I said. So I'm shrugging it off and living the rest of my day, because how can I feel bad about something if I'm not sure that it is actually my fault?

Anyway, today went better.
I woke up and talked to Mason a bit before I left for work since he crashed on my couch.
Then I worked 9 to 3, and got swamped with people all day. I did get a break and lunch, which is good. I also worked on putting out our Breast Cancer Awareness stuff, which I only got halfway through. I did get to talk to the Manager On Duty and Assistant Manager about what went on last night, and received two different versions of feedback. One said that I was right when I said that the MOD last night could have handled things differently, but maybe I should think a little more and adjust my attitude a bit when it comes to the job. I'll give her that; my attitude turned into a terrible one last night. The Assistant Head-Hancho said that he would have a talk to her about it, and saw where I was coming from.
When I got home I talked with Rachel and Ben a bit, then Ben left and got all offended, and Rachel and I went to get pedicures. I got a robin's egg blue color and a pretty flower, and Rachel got a neon pink and an equally as pretty flower.
It was during the pedicure that I received that text, and honestly wish at the moment that I could leave my damn phone alone for more than fifteen minutes at a time.
Rachel and I went by QT to get candy (she got a Reeses and I was craving something caramel and delicious), then to 7-11 to get slurpees. Now we're home and watching "Robin Hood Men in Tights." I forgot how dumb, yet funny, this movie is.
Speaking of, the person who plays Robin of Loxley is Westley from "The Princess Bride." Mind. Blown.
Now I'm just enjoying have a night free. I love having a social life and seeing people, but I need a down night occasionally.

Tomorrow I work at nine in the morning, and at night I'm hanging out with John.

Okay, I'm going to go now because I'm sleepy and it's only 6 p.m. Sleepy tends to lead to cranky. Which leads to "hard to deal with." It's going to be a fun night.

Currently Reading: "The Bermudez Triangle" by Maureen Johnson

<3

No comments:

Post a Comment